Ward Boundaries

I'm not sure of the last time I've cried so much ...

Thankfully I didn't really start crying until we left the stake center... My head hurts, my eyes are red, my nose is running and I feel like a huge dork because I can't seem to stop. I'm not talking loud bawling or anything - just quiet, trying-not-to-cry tears. Trying to accept things that I cannot change tears. Trying not to upset the children tears. Digging DEEP for the faith I know is there tears. If I'm being honest with myself, selfish tears.

I grew up in a military family. We moved every three years and that's just the way it was. I always made new friends at each new post and many, many of those friendships have lasted into my adult years. I haven't completely put my finger on why this move is so hard for me but I guess it's because we didn't move. We're still here but our sense of here is now completely changed.

We moved to Texas in July of 1999, almost 9 years ago, and have been members of the Arlington 5th ward since then. Cara turned one here in this house - that's how long ago we're talking. To some nine years may not sound like a lot but, for me, to be in one ward that long is a true record. We live here with our closest immediate family a 20-hour drive away - the 5th ward has been our family. I've been the Primary president, in the Young Women presidency, and now in the Relief Society presidency in this ward. Bryan's been in the Primary, Financial clerk, Executive Secretary and Elder's Quorum presidency in this ward. We have history here...

Today our stake realigned boundaries of 5 different wards and created a new ward. People from the 5th ward were reassigned to 4 different wards, including some back into 5th. We are now members of the Arlington 4th ward. I knew that we would probably be going to a new ward but I didn't think we would be the only active family from 5th ward to be moved into the 4th ward pretty much by ourselves. (There are 2 active single brothers who are also in this boat with us.) All of our other friends from 5th ward had a large chuck of people they would stay with as they transitioned into a new ward family. This is where the selfish part comes in...

The stake president, whom I highly respect and have much love for, asked each ward to stand and sustain the new bishoprics one at a time. When we stood, I looked around to see who else would be in the 4th ward and saw maybe two people I personally know standing with us - none of which were from 5th ward. I don't think I've ever felt more alone. I couldn't help it - two tears slipped down my cheeks as I raised my hand to sustain this monumental change. Now they won't stop.

Sorry if this post is a downer. I know, just like when I was growing up military, that I'm not losing friends, I'll be gaining new ones. I'm just trying really hard to get over the intense feelings of loss I have right now. I do have a testimony of the gospel. I know the church is true. I get it. I'll be relying on that knowledge and faith to get me through this until I come to grips with our new reality.